K is for Killer
How violent our language is. How aggressive we have to be to engage (rolls eyes) our clients. We have to write killer subject lines and sales pages, come up with killer offers that will kick our clients’ asses, hook them and blow them away. It’s all becoming so meaningless, we need ever stronger language. ‘Can […]
J is for Jargon
“Can I pick your brains?” says my friend who, poor thing, works in ‘communication’ and spends his days (plus nights and weekends) writing, editing and translating applications for funding for, well, bullshit. “Pick away,” I reply affably. My friend reads from his screen. “Going forward, innovation and disruption are the key features of our design-driven […]
I is for Innovation
I have seen ‘innovation’ and ‘innovative’ obsessively bandied around enough times (solutions, platforms, applications, strategies…) to suspect it is pure bullshit, but I couldn’t put my finger on why exactly. I mean Innovation is a Good Thing, isn’t it? But I was right (it’s not just me being #grumpyoldwoman). In The Myth of Innovation designer […]
H is for Hack
Frankly unable to bear this word which now seems to mean – what? Tips? Tools? Methods? Processes? Solutions? As in Five Life Hacks or 50.000 Web Hacks. It has such horrible connotations – its very sound is violent. Brain hack, anyone? It’s, like, you know, smashing someone’s head open with a hatchet in order to […]
G for Going Forward
Can someone please tell me why we now have to say this instead of ‘from now on’? I once asked this on a Facebook thread and got a sanctimonious little lecture about how there was a distinction and what it was. Maybe they were being sarcastic: I would love to be enlightened. Please leave your […]
F is for Functionalities
The wild card applications of this word are endless. Incentivize future-proof functionalities. Repurpose robust functionalities. Synergize mission-critical functionalities. Functionalize synergistic initiatives. Now it’s your turn. The A-Z of Bullshit, Hype and Cool Stuff is part of the Blogging from A to Z Challenge 2016
E is for Epic
An excellent option for those who have heeded the plea to refrain from across-the-board Awesomeification. No seriously epic bullshitter should be without this word. The A-Z of Bullshit, Hype and Cool Stuff is part of the Blogging from A to Z Challenge 2016
D is for Driven
From Awesome to Zeitgeist, you’ll be blown away by this no-brainer A to Z of buzzwords, hype and cool stuff. D is for Driven Stick this handy all-purpose word onto any other buzzword and you’re rolling. Whether you’re target-driven, option-driven, assessment-driven, performance-driven, data driven or customer-cloud-interface-driven, how very dynamic, proactive and fast-moving you are. […]
C is for Click
From Awesome to Zeitgeist, you’ll be blown away by this no-brainer A to Z of buzzwords, hype and cool stuff. C is for Click Clicks and Bricks, Clicks and Mortar, Clickbait, Clicktivism. For truly impactive discourse, though, you need more of a mouthful. How about clickability metrics or enhanced click-to-cloud vectors? I just made those […]
B is for Bullshit Bingo
From Awesome to Zeitgeist, you’ll be blown away by this no-brainer A to Z of buzzwords, hype and cool stuff. Aka buzzword bingo. The fun game that makes business meetings borderline tolerable. I thought it was a joke, but people really do play it – and not just in corporate environments. (A retired schoolteacher friends […]